


From the Mouths of Babes

by BelleLorage



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: A slice of life, Clint Barton Feels, Clint Barton is a good parent, Fluff, Gen, M/M, good ol' fluff, kids being kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-03
Updated: 2016-04-03
Packaged: 2018-05-30 22:10:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6443857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BelleLorage/pseuds/BelleLorage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The most bizarre things, Clint decided, happened on days when everything seemed normal.</p>
            </blockquote>





	From the Mouths of Babes

The most bizarre things, Clint decided, happened on days when everything seemed normal. Being his turn to pick up the kids from their extracurricular activities, Clint Barton left his extra sexy, super cool ninja agent husband and was ready to hear a thousand and one stories about what happened during the day. He was more than ready to answer questions that ranged from about the most mundane things of everyday life and the most extraordinary one. He was super ready to kiss boo boos and to order 'stop'. He was mega ready for not so subtle suggestions about future gifts and big teary eyes that begged for treats. Phil would be so goddamn proud of him! _Bring. It. On._

Entering the building where their children were learning karate, he felt confident that everything would run smoothly. He waved to their offspring who, like good children, were running and playing and screaming around with the other children waiting for their parents. With a few nods, he greeted the other adults present and then knelt to receive two pairs of arms around his neck.

"Hey, babies" Clint said, showering the two with kisses. "Did you behave?"

"Yeah!" Robert said, climbing onto his lap, kissing his cheek.

"I was the best today, daddy! Sensei totally said so!" Emily exclaimed, practically bursting with pride.

"Wow! Really? What did you do?" Clint asked, collecting their children's bags and helping Robert to put on his sneekers.

"She beats the big kid!" His youngest said, complacently handing his legs to his father while he (tried to) straighten the collar of his gi.

Emily was squirming at his side, practically bouncing with every beat of her heart. "I'm so awesome!" She finally said, opening her arms and Clint just couldn't help himself and popped a kiss on her cheek.

"Of course you are, baby. You take after me." He replied, guiding his youngest child to stand up and then pulling Emily so she could sit in his place.

"Daddy?" Robert called after a moment or two of uncharacteristic silence.

Clint almost missed it due to the constant noise and the many frantic children still running around the cramped room, but years of espionage and tarining were not put to waste. "Yes, honey?" He asked, lacing Emily's shoelaces.

"What's Easter?"

And it was as if the world had ended. Any noise that could have been generated was silent when the collective paternal environment turned its attention to the archer. He could feel it before he saw it, a room full of eyes piercing him with their collective gaze. If he were in any other scenario, Clint would be taking his hidden throwing knives and start throwing! That, my friends, was the level of hostility. Clearing his throat, he smiled at his children. Best not to show fear or hesitation. Pack animals tended to attack when they sensed those.

God! He wanted to kill the person who had told his son about Easter. Phil and him didn't celebrate many "traditional" holidays. Before getting married, Clint didn't even recognize Christmas! However, due to extreme exposure to Steve Rogers puppy dog eyes and sheer peer pressure from Tony Stark his views on the holiday changed. After they got married, both he and Phil sat down and decided what they would and wouldn't celebrate. No Thanksgiving (Clint hated turkey with a passion, and to further his point, he said that he was grateful enough on the other days of the year so the holiday was unnecessary), no Valentine's Day (They couldn't guarantee being in the same continent on a good day, qui ça a holiday), no Labor Day (Just the mere suggestion made them both laugh until they were blue in the face). Phil convinced him to celebrate the Fourth of July and Clint got them to celebrate Halloween. And Easter ... It was completely irrelevant to both of them. They never even remember it was a thing. That is, until now.

Until a group of parents looked at the archer as if he was a sadist Satanist that never told his kids about Easter.

"Well, you guys remember what I told you about Jesus Christ, right?" He said, helping Emily up and putting her backpack on her.

"Yeah" was the collective response. Ok. So far, so good.

"And how he was executed for his beliefs?" The two nodded.

"Well, Easter is the date where Christian comemorate him rising from the grave." Yeah. Simple. Clean. He liked it.

There was a pause. Two pairs of beautiful and innocent eyes widened as little jaws dropped.

"Jesus was a Zombie ??" Emily asked, incredulous and excited.

"Right on!" Robert exclaimed, laughing in delight.

_Well... Shit._

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!  
> I hope you enjoyed this fic! It's based on the real life account of the singer Voltaire and his little demonslayer <3 (It felt so appropriate for Clint, dontcha think?)
> 
> Anyway,
> 
> Comments and kudos are loooove ~~<3


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